Nov 8, 2023
HEY BITCH WHATS UP BITCH SUCK MY DICK BITCH. let me talk to you.
So its been a long periolodically time and well chat, not much has changed. my homies have all still, (if not confirmed to) have dropped me, so thats great. but atleast i have a new job, pays like shit but i mean its better than nothing? uh lets seee uhhhh well if youre reading this hi, you should(?) know who you are, heres my message: "ah ha so you have made it! despite me saying this was bad, (its bad like cringe oohh aahhh eee wow thats cringe, venting on a blog, in 2023? huh erm ok homie.) whatever i get it lol, im not mad at yopu for viewing this, its public for a reason." anyway chat help me out, so the Metal Gear Solid collection Vol. One came out last month, its 60 dollars but has 5 games. (mgs1, mgs2, mgs3, mg1 and mg2) super cool and ive loved mgs for some time now but idk if ill ever get around to playing them. OR should i get Rayman Legends, 40 dolans but ive always wanted to get into it, here though idk if ill even like it? but i think i will? anyway also thinking about trying to restart my youtube channel so ? anyway thats all for today hehehehahahah ok bye.

May 4, 2023
I have decided to update my site. it at least gives me something to do. it is currently 12:30am and im probably going to pull an all nighter. my parents leave for the airport at 4am so i might as well, i might nap later idk ill probably fall asleep. im still very frustrated with work and shit. 2 interviews this past 2 weeks thats it and ive heard nothing back, so great. it feels good to talk to people online again, although i dont think i fit in well and most of my messages go unoticed, feels bad man. (no im not a 4chan user dont ask) i wish i just had a small group of online friends again but i doubt that will ever happen again. i havent eaten much either lately not that im avoiding it, i forget alot of the time that and we kinda have no foods in the house lul. anywayz i think thats all i have to report on for now, bye bye.

April 16, 2023
Lately i have been so frustrated and honestly sick and tired of my life. i dont fucking do anything im a usless piece of shit. i genuinely wish that i was dead. ive never been successful i never will be. i have no passions for life and i cannot see a future for myself i just wish it was over. I have no friends and do i blame anyone? no because i wouldnt want to be friends with me either. i fucking hate myself so much i dont understand why everything has to be so hard for me. every little thing sets me off and i cant even accomplish anything because i dont see a reason or a purpose in trying anymore. im on and have been on all sorts of drugs but nothing fucking helps anymore. not even my fucking therapist seems to care side note I FUCKING HATE THERAPY I FUCKING HATE IT SO MUCH!!!! i just want to be dead i want to be gone. i doubt anyone would notice and id be forgotten a week later. everything is so fucking taxing and i cant sit here and act like im ok because im not. life will never get better for me because my dumbass refuses to make changes, i really just wish i didnt exist anymore i fucking hate it. everyday im told how lazy and useless i am and how everything im dealing with is my own fault. i just want it to be over.

March 14, 2023
hahaha i finished the paper shredding! (LFG) Im going to be paid for my work (around 3.5 hrs) I also got to organize the pantry today which took me around an hour but now everything is actually visible and organized. My mom wants me to become certified in HTML/CSS i mean sure. Yesterday i tried to go out to get a staple remover i went to 3 stores and no staple remover but of course i ended up spending like 45 dollars on my outing on food, snacks, monsters and cat food lol. Also the recent cookie run ovenbreak update came out yesterday and honestly i dont hat eit. a lot of people hate the rework but its so much easier to level up your cookies and pets now so i really dont understand why so many people hate it. and the new cookie, currant cream is so cute i love her ^_^

March 12, 2023
Today i spent the day working on my website. I also went out to go get smoothies with my brother. Honestly mine wasnt all that good. Since today is sunday i havent really tasked myself with doing much. but tomorrow i think i would like to go out shopping as well as contiuing to do my job of shredding old documents XD. I have been applying for so many jobs lately but i havent heard back from any of them. since i have no friends or job i don't get out much.